May 19, 2011

Masturbation: flying solo

I believe the saying goes 'everyone masturbates'. I have to admit that I was in my late 20s before I discovered the beauty of self pleasure. Since that time I turned into a closet masturbator. No, this doesn't mean that I pretend that I don't; it simply means I masturbate in the closet. This may seem rather strange to you, but it makes perfect sense to me. I get home a bit earlier than expected and the house is empty, but for how long is unknown. I need some me time and I don't want to get caught. Thus the closet masturbation is born.

Since my hood piercing, I have felt the need to masturbate more often. If I am having a bad day I tend to tense my body up. This leads to my inner thighs being flexed and my piercing rubbing my clit. Suddenly I am aroused. Other times I am turned on simply by the fact that I am wearing tight jeans leading to constant friction on my labia and clit. Here we go again, I am aroused. Is the closet free?

Men seem to be a little braver than me with their masturbation habits. I was chatting with a guy earlier today and he mentioned that he was going to masturbate in the public restroom while at a tradeshow convention. I thought to myself how crazy that sounded. I couldn't get off with people milling about added to the fact that the sound of a vibrator might be a little suspicious in a public restroom.

I wonder what crazy places do others find acceptable to masturbate. And of course my faithful twitter followers can through with oddities I could never have imagined.

1. The back of my girlfriend's tiny hatchback while she drove from Macon to Atlanta, Ga. Neither she nor other passenger in the front seat ever knew.
2. Once when I was a teenager in chemistry class while class was in session, staring at this girl's thong stick out.
3. Alone on a nude beach.
4. In a tanning booth.
5. In a spa after a massage.
6. At work.
7. I went fishing and had a wank by the lake!
8. In Iraq standing an 8 hr guard post. Did it to stay awake.
9. In a science lab.
10. At my friend's house in his room while he was called away to eat dinner or some other errand.
11. In a airplane lavatory 1 of the flight attendants had big boobs soo I had 2 pop 1.
12.  My weirdest place was gas station restroom in Morgantown, WV ;)
13. On the bus/train
14. Umm, on a train to atlantic city
15. In the car while driving. 
16. Wifes sink - if she only knew.
17. My Dad's office.  This happened when I was 16.  It was a Saturday and I was working for him, no one was around.
18. At my desk at work. Suggestive texting with my wife led to a need for release.
19. Work, restroom & cubicle - bored, saw sexy pictures, used soap and rubbed through my pants.
20. In my car - I love jerking off while driving home at night :D.
21. Doctors office - the doctor was hot. he stepped out for a couple while I was on the table.
22. At a work site restroom when a teen
23. In an airplane lavatory.
24. In the movie theater watching Shrek 3.
25. Back seat of a bus.
26. While driving.
27. In a tanning bed.
28. In in the parking lot of Walmart while I waiting inside the car.
29. Outside of a home peeking in a window on a girl in a bathtub.
30. When I was a teenage boy before I started driving I was one of the last to get off in the afternoon...so I would "get off" before I "got off"...no one knew.
31. Interstate 4 near Tampa -  Once while stuck in traffic I got the urge to relieve some tension so I pulled it out and jerked it off.
32. Under my desk while emailing with Rebecca.
33. In the closet of my aunt searching for her high heels and found them ;)
34. Th restroom at work - so many hot women at work.
35. Softball Dugout; just finished practice all alone, horny!
36. Standing up in the copy room at work.
37. Blue Martini Sidewalk bar on Sunrise in Ft. Lauderdale.  In microminiskirt. Just before the big happy hour crowd. Probably seen by some men and women!
38. McDonalds - Late at night in the 24 hr window. Really hot girl so I jerked off into the burger she ordered.
39. Hospital room while wife was sleeping while in labor and I have a thing for nurses!
40. Laundry Room  - gotta love our Whirlpool Duet!
41. Driving in the Car - Masturbating in the car is exciting and easy. Aside from the foot wanting to mash the accelerator when I am about to cum.
42. Under desk at work while reading erotica. in a large office with many co-workers around! Hottest yank of my life!
43. Next to my boyfriend while he is asleep.  It's the rush!
44. Sister in law's closet while she is in the house - I took her panties from her hamper
    
    
    
    
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