June 27, 2011

5 reasons 
I won't have sex with you

Whether you have had the privilege of tasting my sweet pussy or you long to finally dip your hard cock inside my warm body I would like to explain to you why it may never happen (again).

1 - You aren't my type: As a swinger I must admit that looks play a huge role in selection.  Yes personality is minutely important, but if you don't attract me by your face and body I will likely never get to know you well enough to hop in the sack.  Of course the up side to this is that my type changes constantly.  Who or what I am into today may be totally different tomorrow.  Sometimes patience is a virtue.

2 - You have bad breath:  You may have the best oral hygene in the world, but if you eat a giant sub packed with onions, italian spaghetti sauce and garlic bread, or spicey Indian food you are going to carry that with you all evening.  It's best to stick with lightly seasoned food before heading out to the club.  Bad breath is such a turn off that you won't ever get that chance...with me.

3 - Over apologizing:  So we are happily going at it and you lose or never actually got a full erection.  It happens, I understand.  It's what you do when you figure out that you are not going to be able to fuck that is important.  I understand how embarrassed you must feel, but please, please try not to keep saying you are sorry and continually ask me for a second chance.  I'm already slightly unhappy about the occurence, annoying me makes the situation only worse.  Apologize one time then we can do other things to enjoy each other. 

4 - You have a big sore on your mouth or worse - down below:  I admit this one has never been an issue, but if it is you can bet that nothing is happening!

5 - You didn't ask:  Here we are at a swingers club, I'm chatting it up with nearly everyone, but you.  Say hello, do something to get my attention.  While you might think I'm too busy to talk to, too pretty to approach - you might be surprised.  You never will never have a chance if you don't ask.

Look for 5 reasons I will have sex with you coming up!!

Comments:

1. Your reasons make sense to me. As a male, reasons #3 and #5 are slightly different. #3 would be a lady just laying there like a log and assuming that I should get excited just because I'm having sex. She feels that I should be the one who magically knows what turns her on. My "trick" is in these situations to have her in cowgirl position which usually limits her lack of enthusiasm. #5 for me is a woman who's being indecisive. I don't have all night. Are you or are you not into me? There are a lot of women at the club/bar/event so politely turn me down so I can move on the to the next lady.